Sidney Crosby Still Hasn't Come Out Yet, and He Wants Me to "Stop Asking"

I just have his best interests in mind.

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    Pittsburgh Penguins captain Sidney Crosby has, arguably, been the face of the NHL since he entered the league in 2005. The man who was once Sid the Kid is now almost 40 and is a hero and an icon to many hockey fans across the globe--especially in his home country of Canada. It really is important for children to have a good role model to look up to.

    But what about the gays?

    Crosby, as it stands, represents the same white, cisgender, heterosexual, male population that is already covered one thousand times over in the National Hockey League. It is, at this point, completely selfish of him to continue to pretend to belong to it. Sidney rarely mentions his partner Kathy Leutner who he's been dating in secret for several years--a woman so beautiful that no one would dare think he might be homosexual. We see through your tricks, Sid. Bisexuality exists.

    Crosby, notably, gifted his agent Bayne Pettinger a pride jersey and left a note explaining how proud he is after Pettinger had come out as gay. Someone reading between the lines may interpret that as "proud of you for doing what I couldn't."

    Despite this (and his public relationship with known homosexual Evgeni "Geno" Malkin), Crosby vehemently denies accusations of loving men.

    "I'm not gay," Crosby commented, "and if I was, why would it matter so much to you?"

    It doesn't matter to me, Sid. No, this is much bigger than me.

    Crosby's habit of repressing his sexuality likely started with his father, who refused to let his son even become a hairdresser--an occupation perceived as effeminate.

    He continued, "You need to stop asking me personal questions. I've given you an answer. Do you want to talk about hockey?"

    I was unable to ask if he thought he would be out if he had become a hairdresser. For what it's worth, I think he would.

-Romeo J.       

3 Game Suspension is a satire publication and does not claim to be a credible source of news and information.